Resurrection Code
by risika-dragon
Summary: Sequel to Purgatory Bust. Sad at first, but v3 and Rissa must bring Sargimf and v1 back from the dead after the incident in Book 30facing new spiritual guides, airport mishaps, and insane dreamspirit master.
1. Prologue

Hello to all that enjoy the Rissa/v3/v1/Sargimf series, especially it's parent, **Purgatory Bust**. This is the sequel, **Resurrection Code**. After Book 30, Visser One and Sargimf died, so now it's up to everyone's favorite Andalite-Controller and vampire-dragon duo to get them back. How will they do it? Even more so, what crazy predicaments are fated to stumble upon their path? Well, to Heaven and Hell and Purgatory alike, watch out spirit world, here we COME!

Oh, the first chapter is kinda sappy and depressing, but it's merely a speed bump in the humor to come! Oh, it's in my POV, but the rest will probably be in Visser Three's. It's just the prologue!

Disclaimer: I don't own Animorphs, or any characters that were created by Sinister Shadow. However, I do own Sargimf, the lovable, horny Hork-Bajir. And the spiritual ideas and epiphanies found here belong to only one taco-chowing, fire-lovin' dragon.

Dedicated to **Sinister Shadow **and **Darth Vader es Cool 5**.

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**Prologue**

**Rissa**

I raced as fast as my limbs could carry me up the hill, already panting and sweating in the oxygen deprived air. However, I'd been raised in similar mountains as a kid, so the terrain didn't bother me. No, something far darker and sinister did. A distant memory, of a book that hadn't ever been my favorite in the Animorph series, that was playing out this very moment.

Book Number Thirty to be exact. It had been in Marco's point of view, coming to this very moment where he made the horrible choice between life for his mother and death for her captor. Eva, Visser One. I hadn't told Visser Three any of this, despite its importance, much like everything else I knew from reading half the books in my home dimension. Why? There was no telling what even a shred of difference could affect, so I'd played about influencing things, much like the Elimist--except I wasn't an all-powerful, galactic being who controlled time and space and light.

Well, I _could _think I was, but that involved a bunch of alcohol.

At that moment, I'd desperately wished I'd snuck off from the Yeerks for a few hours and acquired the morphing ability--the Animorphs all, but pointed out where Cassie's barn was. It would've raised questions and--from Visser three--outrage maybe, but now, I needed to be a wolf or eagle or Hork-Bajir. Something stronger and faster and more agile.

I could see the lip of the topmost cliff now, watch as Esplin in his camouflage crab morph slashed at Visser One and she responded with a blast from her Dracon beam. No, no, no! Why had this still happened? After we'd gone to Purgatory and back, after that time on Halloween in the meadow that Iniss, Ellie, Sargimf and I witnessed, how could they still be trying to murder each other? My throat closed up even as a rippling screech came out as a strangled yelp. Stop! Please stop!

A blur of green and rough scales descended from the trees above, a Hork-Bajir. I sighed in relief, but instantly tripped over my feet when I saw it wasn't one of our own. The brute knocked the Dracon beam from my hand--not that I would've had much luck using it in the first place--and slashed out at me. I yelped and slid backwards In the dirt.

Another arc of blade came whistling at me and it was only pure luck, ingrained instinct and slippery grass that made me slide away in time. I reached into one of my jeans pockets and pulled out a Swiss army knife. However, though it had helped me on long, dark walks to avoid stalkers and rapists, I didn't think it would be much use against a seven-foot-tall, bladed Godzilla.

"Back!" I growled, swinging it chaotically. "I got a woman's aggression and I'm not afraid to use it, bucko. Don't make me go all taco-noto on you!" I tripped over an elm's uplifted root behind me, twisting my ankle and lay sprawled on the ground.

"Die, Yeerk," the lizard hissed, and brought his blades down upon me. I screamed, not wanting to face old Aldrea back in the Purgatory prison cells again yet.

Another Hork-Bajir, with darker scales, larger height and eyes the color of freshly spilled blood, leapt down from a rocky ridge and whipped his blades across my opponent's throat. Red and blue blood splattered over me, but I looked up gratefully at _my_ man, _my_ knight in shining armor.

I stood up, forgetting the sounds of chaos and the throbbing pain in my swelling ankle a moment, and wrapped my arms around him. "Took you long enough," I scolded. "It may be a good time to work on your punctual skills. Face it, they suck."

Sargimf chuckled and bent his head down to lick my cheek in a brief kiss. "You know you love the suspense. Way better than Highlander movie--" He caught me when I swayed and toppled, my foot aching like Fat Bastard--a.k.a. Norm--fell on it. "I'm starting to think Iniss had the right idea about hiding in the janitor's closet."

"Too right." I gently placed my hand over the large gash in his chest, too close to one of his two hearts for me. I took a deep breath, leaning against him. "We have to stop Vissers One and Three. They shouldn't be killing themselves."

"Are you kidding?" he asked, skeptical. He glanced up at where they continued to circle, but didn't notice the not-so-native mountain goat advancing near them, followed by a definitely-not-so-native Bengal tiger. "We'd have better luck breaking up a shark frenzy."

"Please?" I begged, squeezing him, stealing some of his warmth into my shivering frame. "They may be a pair of hateful, impatient, stick-up-the-butt bozos, but they're still our bozos. We snag Visser One and drag her away into the woods from Esplin. His morph can't climb or even have long endurance. Then, we tie her to a tree and come back to knock him silly with a Dracon beam, then drag him back somewhere else from the battle."

Sargimf arched a scaly brow, scowling. "That has got to be the most ridiculous, suicidal plan I've ever heard. We could do that, or run like sane people and head for safer ground. No one'll notice and we could hide for a day or two, since we fed yesterday."

Yeah, he, eh, still didn't know I wasn't exactly a full-blooded--or any blooded for that matter--Yeerk. Ignoring that, I cocked my head to the side. "Since when are _we_ sane? Wouldn't that make us a pair of unimaginative, heartless Andalites?"

He bristled for a moment, but sighed. "Fine. Hop on." I crawled onto his back and hooked my arms around his flexible neck, burrowing my head in the crook of his collarbone. "One of these days, we're going to end up dead in a ditch because of this." He jumped onto a low, springy oak branch, and soared off toward the cliff's face.

"Feh. I'll just drag ourselves back from Purgatory," I scoffed. "It's easier than it sounds."

He decided not to comment for some reason, scaling up the dirt wall overtop where the battle played out. I spotted a Hork-Bajir I'd chatted with that very morning, almost shredded by a grizzly's claws. Still holding grudges from Halloween, I swung the knife from my hand and watched it bounce off Rachel's snout harmlessly. Still, it provided enough distraction for Emiton 342 to crawl away.

"There!" I pointed to Edriss's staggering form, and Visser Three's not quite invisible body with all the gore--much his own--painted over him. "Hurry, hurry, hurry!" I cried, pasting myself against him and ignoring the bugs catching in my wide-open mouth as he ran as fast as Quicksilver.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a blue-gray centaur careen toward us, unable to even yelp out a syllable before the blur of young Andalite slashed his tail blade at Sargimf. FWAPP! Sickened, my stomach twisting upon itself in multi-loops, I watched the left arm drop to the ground. Sargimf howled in agony and threw his good arm towards Aximili, leaving a dark blue gash in the Andalite's chest.

During the battle, I was thrown head-over-heels off of him in his wild thrashing to the wet, iron-smelling soggy earth. I gritted my teeth, watching as my love desperately fought, and stood as well as I could, stumbling back towards our main objective. I could take either Visser down with each having an arm behind their backs and blindfolded, let alone adrenaline crazed, battle ready and with me dragging a twisted ankle. Then again, stubbornness killed the cat--I think.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck," I swore, ambling towards them vainly.

Then it happened. As if a piece of time was taken away, I watched Visser One's body teeter on the edge of the cliff, gravity yanking back on her towards the empty cavity of space. Panic filled the eyes of Visser Three, I could see clearly as day, as if he hadn't expected their scuffle to ever end. Bile rose up my throat. No…

Then the slender, black-maned woman was gone, swallowed by the unforgiving sky.

Another cry of pain and terror echoed back at me and I watched another death take place. Sargimf had taken on a new opponent, ironically one of Visser One's subordinates. Hadn't we spoken with the same guy a couple weeks before over acorns and coffee? The Dracon blast sizzled my Sargimf into scattered atoms.

"AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

I don't remember the rest of the battle, how it ended, whether we slaughtered more on Edriss's side, or our own. Faintly, I'd noticed a human-Controller pick me up by the armpits and pull me towards a parked Bug Fighter. There was a glimpse of Esplin's face, once again blue, furry, and Andalite all around, but instead of whooping with glee at the news that the enemy who'd outnumbered us had lost, he merely nodded and glanced out the window of the Bug Fighter.

Halfway back to the Blade ship, my teary eyes and foggy mind began to clear at a snail's pace, misting slightly again when I touched the sliver of Hork-Bajir blade Sargimf had made into a pendant, hidden under my black shirt. Something seemed to spark a moment, but fizzled out.

It came again when I glanced at Visser Three, his deviated, silent self still a mass of blood plastered, sticky fur. Clinging to the mass of red, purple, and blue gore were a few strands of onyx hair, long and silky with a slightly gleaming shine. I simply knew who owned them.

I gently prodded Visser Three and he glanced down at me. I shuddered a bit at the lost look in his eyes. I tended to think of him as…not a father or brother model, maybe a uncle who was happy and giddy one moment, while on the couch in stained boxers and hammered the next day. Like a Hallmark card. (Not now. Go prance and light things on fire somewhere else.)

I shook my head and plucked the black strands off him. "These are Edriss's."

(Oh…they are,) he mumbled, fingering them slightly, wiping off the dried blood.

I pulled the blade shard out from under my shirt. "And if no one else knows, we know where they are." The somber depression that had befallen me slowly peeled away like the dried crimson flakes that drifted off me as I wiped my skin and clothes clear. A plan was slowly forming in the base of my mind. "The Pyro Poulet has come up with another great scheme."

(The _fire chicken_?) he translated. (What are you talking about now? We can't follow her and--) He glanced at the green spike in my palm. (And Sargimf to…) He glanced around at the small ship, with only two human-Controllers inside with us. He whispered, (Ah, Rissa, how would we be able to get another near-death experience?)

Well, at least he wasn't COMPLETELY turning the idea down. He HAD to be desperate. "We know our way around Purgatory like that!" I snapped my fingers. "And don't sweat the basics. Are you ready or what? You didn't get to being a bad ass V Three by not being reckless and stubborn…wait, I think those are the only two reasons _why_ you made it."

He snorted in agitation, some of the old Esplin seeping back into him. (And how do you propose we do it?) he spat.

"Okay, I'm going on a hunch. I've watched enough witchy and vampy movies to have a slight clue on this." I grabbed the hair off him and threw down to his hooves, as well as the blade. "Crush these under your hooves first, then we're supposed to consume the powder."

He did so, but paused before sucking up half of it. (What is this supposed to do besides screw up my intestines?)

"Since you went around the spirit world in your host self, I think they'll do the same. If we eat a bit of mortal essence from each, it'll draw us to them faster than the silver cords," I explained. I went down on my knees and started, erm, licking the floor, amused by the sidelong glances from the human-Controllers.

Esplin grinded his fore hooves in the remaining material. (Now what?) he asked, almost…eagerly.

I wiped my mouth. "You really want to see her, huh?"

(Who else am I going to bicker with?) he asked nonchalant. (Iniss? I used up all my sexual harassment and incompetence jokes on your last two presidents.)

I grinned at the other two passengers, walking up to the controls. "Hey, boys," I started, though they were twice my age, probably thirty-two. "You might want to grab onto something. This ride is about to get a little bumpy. Hold on!" I pressed a dull red button--much to humorous reference--and a dull beeping noise started.

On the side of the Bug Fighter, the hatch started to open slowly, sucking air into black, starry space. I let out a whoop of insane freedom, feeling my weight start to lessen as I was pulled towards it. I quickly set the timer so it would be open for only fifteen seconds.

(What?! This wasn't what I was thin--AHH!) I crashed into the Andalite, sending both of us spiraling out into the freezing darkness.

My brain waves and heart beats became irregular, body twisting upon itself as warmth and movement and thought were sucked away. There was pain. Oh yes! Excruciatingly, mind numbing agony swept through me as in what seemed like eternity stretched on, limbs bending into pretzels and spine snapping itself in frantic jolts. Visser Three did no better, his eyes bulging from their sockets like a cartoon character's, back legs and tail giving a final twitch, then falling still.

Then it was over.

Mist curled around me and I was floating in blank space that cleared as my essence expanded. A figure strode out of the fog, and spoke in a voice I thought nether Esplin or I would hear for another few decades.

"Oh, no. No, no. I thought we were rid of you bastards!"

Esplin rolled a stalk eye. (Hey, Aldrea. Anything new?)

"Why me?"

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Ending with the sadness of despair, we shall move onto the rescuing part…after we deal with spiritual airport security. What people shall the Visser and dragon meet as we wait for our damn plane to arrive? Duh duh duh…


	2. New Parole Officer and Golden Gates

Chapter 1: New Parole Officer and Golden Gates

Visser Three

So, yes, the freaking psycho beside me actually DID suck us out into space, thus killing us and yadda yadda yadda. You get the point, I'm sure? Anywho, considering the circumstances leading to prior events, I believe the Andalite-turned-Hork-Bajir took things…rather well. No, seriously!

"I was going about my way, la de da, la de da, sipping lemonade with John Lennon and Elvis Presley, slowly allowing my essence to recover from the last time I had to watch over a pair of cell mates, when SUDDENLY, wonder of wonders happens," she spat, saliva flecking her beak. Can I just comment, ew? Say it, don't spray it. "But no, those same jackasses decide to commit suicide together."

(Hmm, I wonder who they could _possibly _be,) I said offhandedly. (Yikes!)

Aldrea dug her claws into my pelt and yanked me upwards, along with Rissa in her other talons with all the fury of a spiteful female. "Let's make this quick, shall we? I don't like you, you don't like me. Where, oh where, did you guys get attacked now? Show me the hospital so we can get this sorted out. Or I'll just…" Her face and eyes started to darken and swell. "WHERE ARE YOUR SILVER CORDS?!?!"

(Eh…they got lost in the wash?) I said weakly. Air, needed air… Wait, I was dead, since when did I need oxygen anymore? Phew, that's better.

"Fools, you don't just lose silver cords, dimbo and bimbo. Without them, you have little or NO chance of returning to the mortal realm," Aldrea scoffed, then whimpered. "Which means I have to spend another TWO centuries with you in PURGATORY watching your senseless hind ends!" She started sobbing uncontrollably. "Why me, Father Deep?"

"There, there," Rissa assured. "It could be worse. You could have…um…Visser Three, help me out here. I can't think of anything yet."

(Wait a second!) I screeched. (No silver cords, so no traveling back from…) I cast Rissa a spiteful glance. (Let me at her! Put me down Aldrea! I'm going to wring her neck before we end up in guilty nothingness again! Let me at her! Grrr!)

"My bad," Rissa said sheepishly. "What? It was a spur of the moment. I figured there'd be some space/time continuum ordeal that would stall the whole deceased thing."

(I'm going to grill your essence and laugh, I tell you! Laugh!)

Aldrea glared balefully at Rissa. "Are you retarded?"

(Most likely. Now let me at her!)

Aldrea dropped us, backhanded us across our foreheads--sending us swirling into the mist--and sighed, rocking back and forth in the mist. "Find a happy place, find a happy place." She took a deep breath and faced us again. "Well, as it turns out, I'm still dragon freak's officer, but you, Esplin, will have…oh, here he is."

Another figure trotted out of the mist, and I snorted at his bewildered face. (Oh, bite me,) he snapped, twitching his tail blade in agitation.

(Hah, too late, already been done,) I shot back. (I think I preferred Psycho Ellie. She could dance.)

Aldrea thrashed her tail and growled. "Now, now, he'll simply be with you for a century or two. That's how the rules go."

(What?) I spat. (I call your bluff and raise you a Go Burn in Limbo.)

Rissa wrapped an arm around my thin shoulders and the other around my so-called parole officer's. Ack, shiver. "Come on, Esplin. It's like a reunion for deceased soldiers. Right, Elfangor?"

(He ATE me,) Elfangor shouted. (He morphed into a giant alien beast while I was wounded and helpless, and ate me. Did I forget to mention he ate me?)

(I'm right here, you know,) I said.

"Would you shut up about that?" Aldrea asked. "Honestly, ask you anything about the Yeerks involving Mr. Visser here, and all you ever do is whine. He ate me, chewed me to bits with his teeth, had Taxxons consume my leg. Wah, wah. Cry me a river. Why don't you settle this now, huh?"

(With pleasure,) Elfangor snarled.

(Sounds like a good plan. I'll even do it with one arm behind my back so that stumpy tail of his has a chance,) I gloated.

"AHEM!" Rissa cried for attention. "You guys can pansy fight and bitch slap each other AFTER we find Sargimf and Visser One. Now, has either of you seen two recently slayed Yeerks, one oversexed and the other hyper around pixie sticks?"

Elfangor scratched his arrogant, ugly, stupid head. Is it a tad obvious how much I abhor this son of a constipated Taxxon turd? (I don't recall. Maybe in the Seven Pits, or…the Ninth Circle? I think they went past the Gates yesterday.)

"Take us to them," Rissa boosted. "To infinity and beyond!"

"I need an aspirin," Aldrea muttered.

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(Sooo…this is the Gates,) I noted with peculiar interest. (I was expecting clouds and gold and a winged, bearded guy reading a scroll. Did I mention gates too?)

Basically, we were in a giant hall with tunnels opening and closing at regular intervals beside the receptionist desks. Over each hung a glowing GOLDEN sign marked with an appellation like "Catholic", "Muslim", or "Hindu". There was a long line at most of the desks, while the chairs around a few spaces were clustered with people holding tickets. And it didn't just contain humans--even though we were in the Earth based beliefs area--but a few groups of Yeerks, Hork-Bajir, and one or two Andalites scattered here and there. The air reeked of cigarette smoke, stale pizza, and cheap carpeting.

(Which sounds better: Golden Gates or Dingy Express Line?) Elfangor asked. (Actually, they used to have the whole flaming, silver chariots driven by demons and cherubim shebang in the past.)

"What happened with that?" Rissa inquired.

(Hefty costs and equal rights got in the way,) Elfangor explained. (And the incubi and succubi started screwing around the passengers--in every literal sense of the word.)

(Let's get this over with,) I muttered. (That damn concoction of blade and hair brought us here, so they went into one of these afterlives. Where should we start? Heaven, Nirvana, Summerland… What is this? Alice in Wonderland?)

"We can try the Muslim desk first," Rissa said. "I have a feeling a certain hopefully-still-loyal-to-me horny Hork-Bajir went through there. Or tried." Her cheeks reddened in what could've been rage or fury.

We stood behind the single guy behind the desk, obviously Iraqi in origin with the dark skin and thick beard. (Why would he choose--)

"I demand to see my seventy-two virgins this instant!" the man ordered. "I was a god fricking dictator for Allah's sake."

(Oh. I see.) I scratched a cheek, finally appraising a human belief. (We might need to spend a few days, no, years, erm, maybe centuries thoroughly searching this one.)

The desk clerk furrowed his brow at the infuriated man. "Sorry, Saddam-o, but you'll have to wait another few weeks. Besides, we're short of virgins this century. We can provide.." He typed into the computer beside him and frowned. "Two virgins and one pedophile. And one virgin has AIDS, I think."

(Matter of fact, let's try another passageway,) I noted.

The man peered over "Saddam-o's" head and glanced flatly at Rissa and me. "Oh no, not another Hindu. Back of the line ma'am, and, yes, the booth behind the Scientologists." The guy glared at our bafflement. "It's right there. You and your sacred cow head over there. The one by the Mormons."

(I'm NOT a cow, moron,) I muttered.

He ignored us and glanced at his computer screen. "Oh! New opening." He shouted over Saddam-o, Rissa, and my argument bickering. "New opening in Muslim Heaven, people! Can I have a…James Brown?"

Needless to say, we left the bastard--well, I had to be restrained and dragged away by Rissa and Aldrea before I started another warfare for the Middle East. How many were there now? Jerk, he called me a COW. I'm not that bloated, am I?

We went to the next desk, and my confidence and pride soared back like…that fire chicken thing that dies and is reborn. The man here was OBESE, with big rolls o fat hanging off him and those EARS! They drooped like elephant lobes. This was the guy that in grade school, in a soccer game on the playground, he would have been chosen last with the acne-ridden geek with glasses and the kid in a plaster suit.

"Hello, it is good to see followers of my path, any race included, young Yeerk," he said cheerfully, bobbing his head. Well, at least this time I wasn't _escargots_. "Now, sign here and reveal to me how you have lived out your past lives… Oh, no, you both had only one. Interesting. Well, I remember when I tried for high points as well. Hah hah hah."

(Who the heck are you?) I asked.

"My name is Siddhartha Gautama, and I was born in India if you would like to know," piggy said. "Though, most of my children refer o me often as the Buddha."

I nudged Rissa in the ribs. I whispered, (Wow, this guy sure is fat, ain't he?) She glared at me and kicked my knee. (Ow!)

"What did you say about me?" he asked softly, in that creepy calm voice. This guy was psychic, too?

Rissa paled. "Ah, he said you were _phat_. You know, really cool and stuff."

"Oh, that is nice. Thank you, young grasshopper," he said, nodding his bulbous head at me. Sheesh, how many animals was I going to be today? "Now, you would like to enter Nirvana, correct?" WE glanced at each other and nodded. "Alright, I will simply have to tally up your deeds in your only life. Mind you, it might not be the best, but you shouldn't have done _too_ wrong." Pfft, wouldn't _he_ like to know?

And I guess he did.

He pressed a sausage thick thumb to my forehead and another over where the three Andalite hearts were gathered. "Okay, now, this may sting." He started humming really annoyingly, starting to REALLY grind my nerves, but he was done in seconds.

The results were…interesting.

The Buddha gasped, ashen white now and sweating. "How could you…? To so many…? How can one creature be so destructive and dark? You killed, and tortured, and…AH! Get away from Nirvana you demon, and take your prostitute here with you!" He tossed his cup of Mountain Dew at us.

We ducked and ran to the next thing, me crying out, (Flabby! Fatty! Tubby! Piggy!) And, after a moment, (Cow!)

(Very mature, Esplin,) Elfangor commented. (Smooth move. I'm going to love writing all this down on your file. This parole officer job might not be too shabby.) He laughed.

(At least _I_ never impregnated another species,) I grumbled at him.

Okay, we went through the other ancient beliefs, most of them anyway. Hindus, no. Well, I didn't complain when the guy thought I was the incarnation of some dude named Shiva and got me a golden mattress to sit--sorry, we tried the chair. However, no one else from our merry band of spirits wanted me to play Deity for a Day.

Then there were more Catholics, but I pulled Rissa away before she handed back our résumés, seeing as LAST time we were judged…oh, go look in my journal for the Purgatory events. Wait, what are you doing reading my journal? Or my memo here? Get out, get out! I wouldn't read any of yours…wait, how many years is added to Purgatory for lying?

There were the Islamic beliefs, but the Iraqi and other followers were too busy trying to kill each other--though when I left, teaching them better fighting techniques, they were exploding with joy. Literally. We tried ancient Egyptian cults, but the dude there was half-dog, half-man, Anubis, and I didn't want to know about any bestiality going on there. And DON'T get me started on the Scientologists and Mormons.

Finally, we came upon a desk decorated with flowers and pentacles and incense, with a hippie behind it. Or I thought it was a hippie. The person was wearing clothes made out of grass and blossoms and vines, with strangely attractive emerald eyes and curly brown hair. Beside her, a REALLY HUUUGE black cat dozed peacefully.

"Good day to you, young witches," the girl said. "I am Rhiannon, Celtic goddess of protection, reincarnation, and death. Please, enter on through into Summerland behind me, where the meadows are forever green and the moon shines bright and full."

(Good grief,) I muttered. (Aren't you going to pull out our file or read our hearts now?)

She shook her head. "No, once you enter inside, you judge for yourself. Your consciousness is ripped away, leaving you with only your subconscious to judge your actions, good and bad. If they are decent, you will spend eternity in bliss or simply choose to be reborn back into the mortal realm. If they are bad…"

The black cat beside her yawned and began chuckling, grinning needle fangs at us.

_Creepy_. I asked one last question, (Did a certain sugar crazed Hork-Bajir-Controller and a mouthy feminine Yeerk pass through here lately. We've been searching for them and the spiritual mumbo jumbo is all messed up here.)

She smiled. "Why, yes. I invited them myself. Though, the girl was…eccentric." Naw, really, what would make you think that?

"Well, let's go. That's our ticket out of here and into…where is it again?" Rissa asked.

"Summerland."

(Oh, God,) I mumbled, stepping up to the portal. ( I _had_ _better not _see some ageless boy in a green leotard flying around in there.)

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Comments, anyone? Shall I continue on with this tale of spiritual quests? Especially since there'll be a villain later on…?


	3. Summerland and Destiny

Sorry it took so long for this chapter to pop up. And for any complaints I may receive for last chapter: I respect all religions, but LOOSEN UP. Well, except atheism, which isn't a religion par se, so they can be put on the corner shelf on the "Really Boring, Meaningless, Useless Afterlife". Unfortunately, I can't go into much more of that since I've got a chappie to type. Buh-bye!

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Chapter 2: Summerland and Destiny

Visser Three

So we stepped into the _magical_ vertex of dizziness, head rush, and vertigo, with swirling colors and flashing lights and pounding music with a new agie and disco beat combined. It was all very techno, I should say. Once we went past Winterland, Springland, and Augustland--all not mentioned in the spiritual catalogue--we reached our destination.

And yes, there was a fricking big ole meadow with multi-colored flowers and sky-scaling trees and a few streams running by. Something between a lion and eagle looked up from a pond to glance curiously at us, but went back to drinking up the silvery substance. I glanced at Rissa, who had taken the time to, erm, free herself from earthly, um, belongings and was running around the field screaming like a maniac.

"Wheeee! We should see if we can go on that ride again sometime! What a spinoff to our plans! Totally head swirling!" She stopped to grin widely at me, enough that I thought her whole head would slide off from the gash, and chuckled. "All we need now are some margaritas to top it off, with some oatmeal of coarse."

(I would suggest some decaf in your case,) I groaned. (Please, don't let this be a repeat of Christmas. Put your shirt back on, will you? The, eh, the bird-cat-thingie over there is watching.) I glanced around at our surroundings once more. (They're not kidding when they say _Summerland_, are they? Sheesh, I thought Edriss's room was overrated.)

Suddenly seeming to remember why we committed suicide in deep, dark space, pissed off a hormonal Hork-Bajir and a whiny Andalite prince, and went through airport security, the dragon whisked her adornments back up and nodded. "Alright, alright. I know, we're going to look for our pals now. But, eh, which way?"

I then realized something very crucial up to this point. (Why can't I feel their auras anymore?! That stupid blade-slash-hair isn't working.)

"Could be you hacked that up with your lunch back in the tunnel," Rissa suggested, shrugging her shoulders. "Yeah, I can't either. Doesn't make sense. Perhaps there was a flaw or two with my reasoning."

(I can't think of any reason why,) I quipped. (Wait, if the law of physics and nature and, erm, other hasn't been screwed up that much, one of my morphs could find them. So, if they can still carry scents, especially a stinky old Hork-Bajir--OW!) I ducked the next kick from Rissa's bare foot. (Okay, okay, whatever. Still, we should locate them.)

Thankfully, as we'd figured out before, even if I didn't possess morphing abilities from the blue cube, we'd figured something out about the flexibility and mist-like qualities of spirits compared to bodies in Purgatory. In laymen's terms: Rissa was being too lazy to do the morphing herself. I quickly melted from the Andalite body into another with a large snout and cocked ears.

Now, normally, we'd be off searching, but some idiots have to stall, now don't they?

"Awww, how adorable! It's so cute! I wish I'd brought some Bacon Bits…" Rissa mused and scratched my ear. No! Stay still tail! You too leg, stop kicking! "I didn't figure you to be a dog type, wittle Wesplin." Halt leg, before I gnaw you off!

(Can we puh-lease get back to business?) I managed to yelp out.

"Uh, right," she said. Hah, the hand has retrieved itself and it's time to punish that arrogant protester. Come here, tail! "Um, why are you chewing on your butt?"

Stupid tail, I'll saw you--oops. (Nothing. Come on. Show me a scent!)

I trotted around the field, sniffing grass, flowers, dirt, and sticks. No, I wasn't going to sink to sniffing feces! Honestly, I don't think even the Bandits did that in a golden retriever morph. My nostrils jerked around for a moment and the tail went on double duty, thrashing the wind like an experienced foe. The familiar odor of pomegranates and mint trickled up my nasal cavity and my head jerked back and forth.

"Find something, Fido?" Rissa asked.

(Oh, hah, hah. One more crack like that and I'll mark my territory on your ankle,) I threatened, rearing back my leg for emphasis. The dragon instantly shut up. (Yep, it's _her _all right. And something that smells like sunflower and pumpkin seeds…)

"Sargimf!" Rissa screeched with delight. "Come on, come on, we have to find them. Lead the way, Old Yeller."

(I'm serious about the ankle thing, okay?) But my brain didn't care, overtaken by the command and registered by doggy central. Suddenly, without warning, influenced by the canine no doubt, I was HAPPY. I sprinted off and Rissa quickly followed in my wake. Was it just me, or was she suddenly green--no, just the light.

Through leagues deep lakes that we simply splashed across, past groves of the tiniest dwarf pine to the tallest Nawin, leaping through murky swamps and smothering dark caves, we ran. To sum it up, it was like the Lord of the Rings movie, where Aragn, the elf, and the dwarf are chasing after the orcs, but much cooler and dreadfully longer. Don't ask about the movie thing. It wasn't as bad as Alloran's Star Wars craving at least. And don't get me stated on _Star Trek_.

We reached a sandy beach, with really blinding white sand, cackling seagulls soaring above, and colossal, roaring waves breaking against the shore. In fact, on a roughly cut out board of bark, was a green, bladed figure riding the wild waters and letting out long, whooping calls like the idiot he was, is, and will always be. On the beach itself, striding toward us, was an even more familiar figure with black hair that had grown to its more respectable length and inky black, almond shaped eyes.

I shifted back into the stolen Andalite shape. (Nice to see your having fun with yourself,) I grumbled irritably. Come on, after what the dragon and I went through in Purgatory, you'd think this woman would be roasting over a campfire by now. (So, how's the weather?)

She smirked slightly at me, as if she'd forgotten about her, um, little fall. "You know, Visser Three, I remember everything that conspired before in the afterlife, from the hospital to the choice. My subconscious answered everything for me."

(Really, now?) Well, at least I wouldn't have o explain the choice between her and Councilor Four, about why it had taken my mind so long, and she'd surely understand--

SLAP! (OOOOWWW! What was that for?)

"How long does it take to choose somebody's soul? I could've weaved a frigging tapestry of the Yeerk world before you were done. Or, should I say, some spiritual influence sucked us out like a string of spaghetti," she snapped. SLAP! SLAP!

"Nice metaphor," Rissa commented.

(Hey, hey, calm down. It's not my fault you got shoved off a cliff this morning and found out about all that stuff…) Thankfully, the slaps halted. Whew. Blessed be Akdor…

Visser One gave me a queer, puzzling look. "Oh, I almost forgot about that strangely…" She smiled eerily. SLAP! SLAP! SLAP!

(Aaaah! Stop! Desist! Quit it! Oww! Control yourself!)

Sargimf chose that moment to stroll over, watching the action between Visser One and me--summing it up: she hitting me, me trying to sink into the sand and vanish. He snorted. "Really you two. Can't you ever think of anything besides hitting on each other?" He chuckled.

Rissa snickered. "Could you think of an even weirder relationship than theirs?"

Sargimf glanced from us, back to Rissa. "Nope, can you?"

Suddenly, wonder of wonders, a voice, thick, oily, and dark like Ellie's attempt at chicken soup, rang across the sky. (Wah! Hah! Hah! You fools, you semi-existent, arrogant, foolish fools! You've stumbled into my trap, wah hah hah!)

"Foolish fools?" Sargimf repeated. "Is this guy illiterate or what?"

(Aaargh! I shall punish you for that later, muhahaha!)

"What's with the laugh?" Edriss snapped. "Where are you, punk?"

(That's smart, Moron One,) I muttered, rolling my stalk eyes. (Go smart mouth the disembodied voice. Could be one of those Purgatory officers ya know.)

(I DEMAND SILENCE!) the voice yelled.

"You didn't say the magic word," Rissa scolded. "Mine happens to start with a 'fah' and ends with 'ew'. Any clue on what it is, Mr. Meanie?"

(Aaargh!) The air around us grew chilly and dark, the clouds blotted out the sun and the sandy shore swept over the ocean until we were standing in an empty desert. The seagulls above shuddered as if they'd suddenly developed cerebral palsy and shifted into maniacal, cackling vultures. The wind howled and a shadow erected itself off the ground.

(Yah-ooon. Nice theatrics.) I swatted some sand away from my face. (What is this? Nightmare on Elm's Street? I get better effects after an oatmeal overdose.) Mist started swirling through the air and flashing lights sparkled off like explosives in the distance. (And you've got a fog machine and a disco ball? Big deal. Show yourself!)

The shadow cringed slightly, but obeyed, melting into a solid form. (Hmm, I was told you had a big mouth, but sheesh. You probably woke Elfangor out of his grave by now.)

"Naw, not really. We just spotted him about an hour or so ago. Fine and lively as ever." Rissa scratched her head. "Or as lively as the dead can be, that is."

(It's a figure of speech, you moron!) the Andalite growled. He massaged his temples, looking like any typical blue, male Andalite, but for some scars along his wrists and neck, as if he'd tried to commit homicide a dozen times and failed. (I'm known as Celbrako, nut my friends usually refer to me as Destiny. Welcome to yours.)

"Our what?" Sargimf inquired.

(Your destiny.) Celbrako groaned irritably. (That's what they sometimes call me and it's what you're experiencing. I've experimented with death and have become able to switch from life to afterlife, manipulating people's destiny in the process. It's a pun! An ironic joke, you dimwit!)

"Destiny, huh?" Edriss remarked. "That's sorta feminine, don't you think?"

(No, it's not!) Destiny shouted.

"That's cool, that's cool, dude," Rissa said soothingly. "Well, I'm Risika-Dragon, also known as R-D or Rissa. That's Sargimf, my hunk, that's Esplin 9466, and--"

(I KNOW WHO YOU ALL ARE YOU IDIOTS!) Destiny snapped. (WHO DO YOU THINK MANIPULATED YOU IN YOUR LIVES AND NOW DEATHS TO BRING YOU HERE?)

"Huh, I don't get it. Rewind this a little," Sargimf grumbled. "Why did you somehow kill us off?"

(Oh come ON! Two mega-level Vissers and a human girl from another Universe that could've changed everything? I wiped you out and now the war shall come to the Andalite's advantage, duh!) he said with pride.

"Woah, woah, wait. Did I just hear _human_ girl?" Sargimf glared at Rissa suspiciously. "You and I are going to have a little talk about this, honey dearest."

Rissa sighed. "Well, you see, I was reading a book called 'Animorphs' one night. Next thing I know, I'm hitchhiking, write a sign entitled 'Will Take Off Shirt for a Taco' and the love birds over here almost leave me as a smear on the--"

(Excuse me, I'm talking here,) Destiny grumbled. (Didn't anyone ever teach you that interrupting someone else is rude?)

Rissa rolled her eyes. "You lived in your parents' scoop for a long while after college, didn't you?"

(That's none of your--never mind. Thing is, I want to see how far my abilities extend.) His eyes narrowed darkly and glinted at me especially. (You see, I've also learned a little something called the "Resurrection Code". It brings a body and soul back to the mortal realm through a type of separate possession, and I've lined up three others to do it with me.)

"Which in laymen's terms means what?" Visser One asked dryly.

(I can reanimate your carcasses, but instead of _you_ being reincarnated into them, my followers and I shall replace the four of you.) Destiny laughed happily like a child in a candy store. (That way, we take over command of most of the Yeerk armada from within and when the Yeerks are about to loose control, we simply switch back to our own bodies held in life preserving containers I've created in the past year.)

"So why are you still hearing flapping your thoughts like a duck's rear end?" Edriss asked.

(In order to do so, I must basically destroy the original owners' souls of the bodies. I have to crush them into an essence so small it could fit on my pinkie and trap them for all eternity in a glass vial,) Destiny said with pure relish.

(Shouldn't it be silver?) I asked. All four of them glanced at me confused. (Well, usually, the vampire or werewolf or ghost movies, that's the most effective substance. WHAT? I research in my own time, too!)

(Aaargh,) Destiny growled. (This isn't an Anne Rice movie!) He flisked his wrist and snapped his fingers. (Be prepared, for your worst nightmares are about to be unleashed! Bawmuhahaha!)

Something large, green, and scaly with a serpentine body and eagle wings appeared behind Destiny, with shiny emerald eyes and pearly, dagger fangs. It opened its mouth and uttered a savage roar.

(H-h-hey, Rissa, isn't that your cousin over there?) I asked. (What did he just say?)

"Either 'I'm going to eat you', or 'beat poo'," Rissa said.

Destiny grinned with his own violet eyes. (This is one of my associates, Dekeemi.)

"Er, pleased to meet you, sir, ma'am, hermaphrodite?" Sargimf said, retreating slowly backwards.

(Destroy them.)

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Duh, duh, duh. What shall happen to our wonderful heroes?

To my reviewers:

Sinister Shadow: Basically, that's the situation. It's up to two envious Vissers, a horny Hokr-Bajir and an insane girl to save us from an all-powerful, maniac Andalite… We're doomed.

Darth Vader es cool 5: ust don't forget to update stories you've already started on, alright? Or I'll sic Dekeemi on you! Muhaha! How do you like Destiny?


	4. Cheerleaders and Gone

**Chapter 3: Cheerleaders and Gone**

**Visser Three**

So there we were, about to be scorched, bitten, eaten, digested, and finally excreted by Draco-girl, all directed by a deranged Andalite with suicidal issues and power lust. There was really no way out of here, but the guy was pompous and arrogant enough that maybe a bit of distraction and gloating would allow us to escape. (So, wait, all you can do is change the landscape and conjure up scaly flamethrowers? That means you _are_ Freddy Krueger.)

The Andalite glowered at me and raised his hand, halting the dragon's approach. (You don't seem to get it. Okay, well listen up. I can control the scene, yes, but also create more than simply fearsome medieval monster. I can make anything, whether it takes the form of agony or pleasure…) At this, the dragon roared, flames sputtering from its jaws, but the next instant, exploded into a rainbow of rose petals that danced to the ground.

"I'm convinced," Visser One said. "This guy is definitely homo." She glanced over at Rissa, who was busy trying to catch the blossoms on her tongue. "Get that out of your mouth right now!"

(FOR THE LAST EFFING TIME, I'M STRAIGHT!) he snarled. (I LIKE FEMALES, WRESTLE AT TIMES, AND HATE PINK! WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT?)

"That applies to Esplin, too, but we're not sure about him either," Visser One said snidely.

(Hmph. That didn't stop you before,) I said and avoided the slap aimed for my head.

"This is getting boring," Sargimf complained. "I'd rather go back into that dream of mine with chocolate and cheerleaders." He shivered, but whimpered as Rissa stomped on his toes. "Youch! I mean, what cheerleaders? I mean pirates!"

Destiny went back to massaging his forehead. (I can also unlock your deepest, darkest fears embedded in the back of your minds. My powers are even stronger in the Summerland world, where your subconscious is unlocked to its full potential.) He glanced at all four of us, tapping his chin. (I think I'll start out with the weak, human female there. Come here, YOU!)

A length of chain erupted from the ground and twined around Rissa's wrists, yanking her towards Destiny, screaming. She fell forwards in front of him, glaring. (How does it feel to know your nightmares have yet to be unlocked?) In response, she spat at his drooping face. (Oh! Ew! You disgusting, little twerp! Here we go!) He sank his hand into Rissa's forehead and they disappeared in a ball of ivory light.

Sargimf began sobbing. "I don't care if she's a human! No! No!"

From nowhere and everywhere, a high-pitched, feminine scream echoed across the desert and we shuddered, glancing nervously around. This was followed by psychotic snickering. The Hork-Bajir fell to his knees and started dripping tears into the sand.

"Rissa, Rissa, Rissa…" he mumbled.

I sighed. (She was insane, and annoying, and perverse, but…I'm sorry to admit, I'm going to miss that asylum escapee…) I paused, glaring at a shiny, polished door that appeared in midair. (What the…?)

Destiny came storming out, dragging a smirking Rissa at his side and pitched her into our group. Sargimf caught her and started nuzzling her with his beak. Destiny, meanwhile, put that yellow tape cops use around murder scenes around the door and made it vanish. (That was…soooo…terrible. I thought I had a twisted mind.)

"Huh, I'd forgotten about that day…" Rissa muttered. "Wussy. He wasn't even trying to kill me that day. That hour didn't even make Top Ten of my childhood."

Destiny, it seemed, wasn't thrilled by whatever he had seen. He snapped his fingers and a steaming bowl of cappuccino appeared by his hooves. (Aw, that's better. Now, what am I to do to you four now?)

"Let us go?" Sargimf asked meekly.

(NO!) He massaged his temples. (Remember anger therapy.. Remember anger therapy…) he mumbled to himself. (Aha! You seem so sure of yourselves now, together facing me, but what if you were to be separated? Where will your pride and confidence be then?)

The wind picked up and I found myself literally head over hooves flying into another door, hoping this wouldn't be a relapse of Purgatory. Of course, as brave as I am, I needed to make sure I'd survive--for lack of a better word--the fall. I curled up into a ball--as much of a ball as an Andalite could be--to reduce the number of broken bones I'd surely get, and yelled to um, eh, _scare_ away any, er, _dragons _of Destiny's that might be flying around.

(AAAHHH! I don't want to die!) See, very loud and overwhelming. Plus, they knew my demands. (Why the hell does this always happen to meeeee!) Also, I had a question for anyone to answer. (AAAAHHH!) Just more scaring, people. I swear.

I hit the ground with a loud _thump_ and rolled surprisingly _well_. I spun down a hill in this rhythm until a considerate tree was able to stop my fall/roll--and possibly any feeling left in my right leg. I groaned and--yet again--rolled away from the maple a short distance, hurting everywhere.

"Oh Akdor, I think I just got my ass whooped by a plant," I mumbled, not even noticing the fact that my words were spoken and a little odd. I rubbed my sore limb, closing my eyes a moment and swore against this stupid spiritual reality. Maybe there was something to that reincarnation thing if I had _this_ to look forward to for eternity.

I opened my eyes and noticed something weird--as what usually occurs in my life, or death, or un-life if you hadn't noticed. The skin on my hand was a bit…hairless. And olive toned. I shrugged. "So you changed me human? Destiny, you dumbass. I can always morph back, moron."

So, I tried…and nothing happened. Tried again, nothing happened. As anyone could see, this became a haphazard pattern for the next twenty minutes. It resulted in a light sweat on my back--from exhaustion, _not _nervousness, I might add--and a slight shaking of my fists--once more, trying to morph unsuccessfully is tiring. I was calm, yes, very calm, not crazy at all. So calm I was going to WRING THAT MOTHER FUCKING ANDALITE'S SKINNY THROAT. See? Nothing the matter at all.

"There you are!" a feminine, young voice called and I glanced over my shoulder to see a teenage girl with ringlets of black hair, similar colored skin, and inky black eyes… Visser One? But she, but, but she was only sixteen years old! She frowned at my astonished expression. "Hey, you're not much better off. And at least I don't have a red splotch over my left temple."

I lifted my hand and stroked the bumpy area of flesh. "Wonderful. I can't morph, I'm stuck in a fragile human skin, and I have acne! How much better can this get?"

That's when I heard the howling coming out of the woods.

"Well, this guy's original," Visser One muttered. Oh yes, Edriss, it's a bummer he didn't send a legion of my monster morphs after us, huh? Spielberg isn't ever going to accept his film ideas. "I mean, werewolves? You'd think he'd lay low with that after people did such a crappy job on _Blood and Chocolate_."

"Hey, Edriss?" I asked.

She glanced back at me. "What?"

"Shut the hell up and run, alright? No need to ruin the usual scheme of things and get eaten now," I said helpfully. I turned around, pulled up a leg and pumped as hard as I could, not seeing, but hearing Visser One following my lead behind me.

On cue, a pair of ugly, bone-thin jackal-like dogs pounced from a patch of woods I had not noticed until now--is it just me, or was that not there a moment before? Anywho, we ran as fast as teenage human bodies can go, which surprisingly, isn't speedy enough to keep a couple of canines off your heels.

And to make matters worse, a tree root seemed to slither upwards and grasp my ankle--there was NO way I had tripped accidentally like that. Cutting to the chase, Visser One being the clumsy creature she is couldn't move out of the way in the single second I granted her to change course. So we were both sprawled in the roots of a whatever-tree as I shall call it, with two evil doggies sniffing behind us.

"Hey, we're already dead. What can these butt holes do?" Visser One asked.

That annoying, pompous voice--guess who--laughed from nowhere and everywhere, announcing, (True. But you can still feel pain and my pets will shred your essence. How's that on for size? Muhahaha!)

The wolves sat back on their haunches, stretched, pounced, and--

A pair of scaly claws wrapped around my shirt collar--no, somehow even in an unfamiliar human body, I had a pair of jeans and t-shirt on. No, I don't know why. It's somewhere in the Book of the Dead or Bible or something. Anyway, I gulped, knowing only one such Hork-Bajir, turned around, and--since when were Hork-Bajir blades red?

"Nasty little bits you've been if the Pyro Poulet hadn't saved you, huh?" Rissa asked. "Cool, huh? I got sucked into a portal and found myself as a Hork-Bajir. In a way, I _am_ a dragon now. Wahoo!"

"Uh, Rissa, it's nice you enjoy your species change, but eh, you do notice that we're being followed, right?" I asked.

Rissa snorted. "That's impossible. We're high up in a…" She peered down at the ground. "Hey! Dogs can't climb!"

The wolves scaled up the maple--that's it--and made a swipe at us. Rissa, being as much of a klutz as Edriss, tripped over her new found tail and rammed into the two of us, sending all three of us tumbling from the tree. We landed in a jangled heap, my neck a bit too close to those scarlet blades for my comfort.

"Owww…I think I broke my…what do I have now?" Rissa groaned.

Visser One gulped as our pursuers licked their lips, drool dribbling from the thin black flesh. Even in the daylight, you could see a thin trail of hot breath exhaling from their maws. "I'll see you all in Hell."

"Aldrea!" I shouted. "Elfangor! We need some help!"

Rissa snickered. "That's the only time you'll ever hear him say that." She flinched when a wolf snapped at her toes and ducked just in time, nearly decapitating me. "Nice puppies. Let us go and I'll buy you some Kibbles and Bits."

I picked up a fallen tree branch and smacked the closest beast on the snout. "I may not have a blade, but I didn't get the position of Visser Three by wimping out."

"Nope," Visser One confirmed. "He slipped acid in the Councilors' coffee." She picked up some rocks and tossed one at a wolf's eye. Rissa got on my other side, lifting new blades. "Three against two. Those aren't good odds for you suckers."

(Oh really?) Destiny challenged from somewhere.

The wolves yelped for a moment, twisting in pain, and suddenly multiplied from two to four. They circled us and peeled skin back from their fangs.

"You just don't know when to shut up, do you Edriss?" I growled.

(Your destinies are about to end,) the Andalite said oh so creatively.

"Sargimf, Sargimf, he's our male, he can't ever fail!"

"Aaar, our captain of a thousand depths of the seven seas he be!"

(What the..?)

That was when a crowd of human pirates and a mix of human and Hork-Bajir cheerleaders ran over the wolves, the girls carrying a satisfied Hork-Bajir munching chocolate bars and Pixie Sticks. Were those the Steelers uniforms?

One of the wolves melted and shifted into tonight's favorite Andalite, _heeere's_ Destiny. (This is supposed to be a place of despair and suffering, not pep rally! What's with all the pirates?)

"Oye! I be Captain Jack Sparrow now, AAARRR, and as captain, I place ye under arrest, bastard," Sargimf said, standing on top of his cheerleader pyramid. "Ye can't control me. This is my world, not yours, Mr. Alive-And-Breathing."

Rissa scowled at him. "Hey, where'd all those hookers come from?" She growled.

Sargimf lost his mighty sense of pride and turned sheepish. "Ah, um, ye see…"

Edriss pushed Rissa aside and pointed at him. "Why are you still normal compared to us? You haven't lost any years at all."

Sargimf shrugged. "I don't know. I simply believed that I wasn't a little dapsen kid and was normal again."

"Ahem, before we fall into a hugging parade and go downing shots with your smelly sea mates over here, we might want to take care of something." I jerked my head at the Andalite in question, who'd backed away from our small crowd.

(I have had ENOUGH!) Destiny snapped. (Playtime's over. I'm going to finish you off once and for ALL!) He raised his hands and smacked his hands together. An earthquake shuddered the ground and it broke away, until we were facing a cliff. The pirates and cheerleaders screamed and were incinerated in a puff of flame.

"Ladies!" Sargimf cried.

Rissa snorted. "Good riddance."

"AAAHHH!" Visser One suddenly shrieked, and was pulled towards Destiny by an invisible force. "Let me go!" He wrapped his tail around her throat, pulling her mercilessly to the ground, ignoring her nails biting into his flesh.

(I didn't think I'd come to this, but you leave me no choice. It's as if you've been here before,) Destiny mused. Rissa ad I sent each other a momentary glance. (This is known as the Abyss. Few have ever been here but I have hacked through the codes surrounding its borders and have entered multiple times. You might say this is Hell, for any soul that plunges over the cliff can never escape. You simply tumble for eternity. In fact, this'll be the first time I ever do such a thing and will make inhabiting your bodies easier.)

My blood ran cold and my eyes widened in panic as understanding dawned on me, remembering the same look that had crossed Visser One's face not twenty-four hours ago. Except this time, we wouldn't be meeting again in some spiritual beach. Without understanding my next move, I clenched my fists and snarled, "Put her DOWN."

He gave me an amused glance. (Ah, so it finally comes out. Your hatred is turned into adoration for this creature. Interesting.)

I bit my lip. "I don't love--"

He shook his head. (But I'll grant you one last favor. I'll put her down for you.) He grinned demonically with his eyes and pitched Visser One over the cliff, leaving her spiraling and screaming into darkness.

Sargimf gasped. "You…how could you…?"

Rissa was gawking in bewilderment. "Visser One! No!"

Me? I was shaking, and not just with frustration. My worst enemy, my most despised companion, the woman who knew every embarrassing secret of mine, the one who set invisible goals for me in life…was gone. A darker realization struck me: _I'd killed her a second time_. Something hot ran down my cheek and tasted salty when it touched my lip.

After all the insanity that had followed me here…Visser One…Edriss…_gone_.

I ran towards the fiend, all sense of purpose gone, but to destroy this beast as he had destroyed my hated friend. "Bastard!"

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Yes, loopy with humor, and more sadness, but is Edriss gone forever? Will Destiny crush our remaining heroes? Read and review for more Resurrection Code!


	5. The Andalite, The Shadow, and The Pastry

Okay, here's the fourth chapter of Resurrection Code, but I'd like to dedicate it to Sin for her troubles (I won't mention what). I also want to thank her for letting me put them into the worst--yet hilarious--situations. So, Sinister Shadow, enjoy, your, em, moment of fame!

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**Chapter 4: The Andalite, The Shadow, and The Pastry**

**Visser Three**

I ran as fast as those clumsy human legs allowed in the spiritual realm, pumping as fast as I could. Every muscle and sinew and tendon and bone (or whatever I was comprised of at this point) was ready to deal out every ounce of frustration and sorrow into Destiny's triangular, ugly face. Beside me, the two Hork-Bajir kept pace, blades held forward and ready to dice the Andalite in two or twenty pieces.

Rissa smiled in that typical sincere, but completely psychotic way only she could master. "If we hit him at the same time, we should be able to send him plunging while the rest of us can grab hold of each other and stop our fall."

"AARR, we don't let some Andalite bigot send our wonderful lassies plunging overboard like that!" Sargimf commented, dropping to all fours and charging.

Destiny waited coyly, folding his thin arms across his chest and snorting his species' type of yawn. (Do you expect to use brutal force to beat me? Honestly, I thought you would have something a bit more…creative in mind. Heh. I hope your subordinates don't notice the rise in intelligence when I inhabit your body later.)

"Shut your fucking mouth, you liberal--!" I snapped, within three meters of him. I felt my face and realized my lips had resealed, and there was a light dusting of fur that was slowly growing over the limb. In fact, Rissa and Sargimf had to make a wider space between us as my usual form reshaped. _Too late for this… Visser One's already dead._

No matter. I gazed at the void behind Destiny, knowing he wouldn't be the only one who fell down there to join Edriss. Perhaps I'd see her…

"What the!" Rissa tripped as a coil of dirt gripped her ankle, sending her tumbling. An instant later, Sargimf met a similar fate, sprawled helplessly while he chewed at the cord of soil. I myself skipped over the trap, and leapt at Edriss's destroyer.

(NOOO!) I cried. Destiny had laughed at my pounce and instantly disappeared, leaving me to hit the ground with full force, trip, and roll. All four eyes widened as the gap grew closer and suddenly I was spiraling downwards. A cold and clammy feeling wrapped around me, like death by drowning out in the ocean, every struggle I did causing the invisible hold to tighten further.

I kicked and punched and FWAPPed my tail, but to no avail. I tried to concentrate on a morph, any morph, one that had pinions to soar out of this void of nothingness, but my mind was growing cloudy and dimmer. Memories of everything that had occurred around and before me seemed to flicker like dying candle flames and sizzle out. I tried to summon up anything that would protest against this darkness, but it seemed…so…meaningless….

Something soft brushed against my chest? Arm? No, my face, that was it. An imagine of something velvety and black tickled the corner of my brain, but that was it. The brush turned to a prod against my cheek. One lazy eye cracked open, but my vision my too blurred to register the shape or features. The prod then morphed itself into a rigid slap.

(Ow!) A stinging sensation burned my forehead and left temple, but it awakened enough of my former thoughts to see a graceful, beautiful, _frowning_ face before me. I grinned happily back, somewhat giddy for no apparent reason. (Seems we're stuck in this abyss forever, huh? Too bad neither of us brought a game of Clue along.)

"No, I hate that game. Now, listen to me, you arrogant, idiotic, infeasible, narcissist fool. Sargimf was right. Destiny can't completely control this area of existence since he doesn't typically belong yet. We can though," she said in a frantic whisper.

Why was she so worked up about _him_? I was with her, and that way we could bicker however much we wanted now. It was a win-win deal. (You look so funny when you mutter like that. Like a Chihuahua. Yippy yippy yip.)

"Ooookay, I'll speak in moronic tongue for you then. See these?" She pointed behind her and to my moment of disbelief, I saw a massive, obsidian colored pair of wings expand behind her. I remembered a strange dream I'd once had concerning those very things… (A/N: Visser Three's Memo, Chapter 3 to be precise.) "I merely wanted them, and after a few seconds of concentration, I _had_ them."

I shook my head from side to side. (But, eh, you're not a birdie…)

She sighed and groaned in one breath. "I'm going to need extra soap after this." Next thing I knew, her thick, rosy pale lips plastered themselves onto my cheek, eerily soft and tender compared to her usually vicious and cold black eyes.

Electricity surged through my brain. (Oh, what the Seerow are you doing, you freak?) I growled, but didn't for some reason push her away. (Wait, I think we'd better get out of here first, huh?)

She rolled her eyes. "Finally," she murmured, lips still partially glued to my face.

The kaflit morph came easier than expected for some reason, Visser One already soaring upwards and one hand twined around my head as I decreased in size and weight. I gave all twelve wings a test flap and lifted higher through the void, both of us feeling the its sinister pull whenever we strayed far from each other.

Finally, the icy chill of its depths released us and we landed silently on the pitch black earth. Rissa had devised a way to stall for time when we were dropping like stones.

(For the umpteenth time, I'm not a homosexual. What grounds do you have against me?) Destiny snarled. (You're just a stupid female!)

"There you go," she answered. "Stupid female. Obviously, you hate women. And what were your victims? A woman and a straight guy. The reason you didn't send me over first is because I'm bi. It's much harder to kill your own kind."

Sargimf glanced over at the two of us. "Hah! You're both alive…well, you get my drift!"

(How the heck did you escape the Void? _No one _has ever done that. Especially if I'm orchestrating their doom! Their destiny!) Destiny shouted.

Rissa chuckled. "Isn't it obvious? We're still connected to Summerland, which is practically a whirling vortex of thoughts and emotions melded to whatever your subconscious desires and creates." She glanced at four blank stares. "This area is almost a dream itself! And seeing as our subconscious is at the tip of our hands, we control it."

(Why didn't you mention that before!?) I snapped.

She shrugged. "I thought you already knew that. Also, even with that, he's like a higher level than us or whatever. You know, like a forty level magician against our group of twenty level zombies on World of Warcraft."

(Actually, I'm a sixty level rogue,) he corrected. (Wait, forget that! How about I just summon my dragon pal again, have you incinerated, and your ashes scattered across the Void? It sounds reasonable enough for me.) He raised his arm, and was about to say--

"AAAAHHH!" Something small, but quickly growing in stature fell towards us.

Sargimf hopped back on his heels. "Oh, oh! A falling star! If we make a wish, maybe we can get Destiny the heck out of here!"

Visser One raised an eyebrow. "_What_, may I ask, is _wrong_ with you?"

The "falling star" apparently made the wish, landing noisily on Destiny who was too stunned to react in time. The so-called star ended up being a skinny, tall white human girl with curly brunette hair and shocked eyes. I could've sworn I'd seen her before. Maybe on some holiday?

"Sinister Shadow!" Rissa exclaimed. "I haven't seen you since Halloween!" She snickered at the girl's puzzled expression. "It's me, Risika-Dragon. The coolest thing ever happened to me. Guess, guess!"

"You turned into a seven-foot-tall, green alien lizard?" Sinister Shadow said.

Rissa pouted. "Aww, how'd ya guess so quickly?"

"I have my ways," Sinister Shadow replied. "And you can just refer to me as Sin. Okay, one moment I'm walking to my next class, and some idiot kid knocks into me and sends me flying down the stairs… I can't remember much after that. Where am I?"

Sargimf cocked his head to the side. "You're in the spirit world. Somewhere between the Wicca Summerland and the atheist Void."

"Wh-what? You mean I'm dead?' Sin panicked.

"Naw. I can see the silver cord poking out of your ribs," Rissa said. "You're probably in some short-term coma at the hospital. In the meantime, please enjoy the lovely views of the Afterlife. Go skiing through the Norse Alps, with Thor and Fenris, or sun bathe in wonderful Egyptian deserts--though be sure to bring lots of Kibbles and Bits to Anubis. Poor fellow hasn't received a sacrifice in two millennia."

Sin slid off the Andalite underneath her. "Hey, who's that guy?"

(I'm Destiny…) he groggily answered.

"Oh! You mean like my future guide or something? No, probably one of my spiritual officers, huh?" she said.

(NO! It's merely my nickname, my alias, my appellation. What is with humans and that word or Fate? Sheesh.) Destiny waved his hand and another bucket of coffee appeared at his fore hoof. (This was supposed to be a quick job.)

Sargimf noticed the confusion on the girl first. "Yeah, he's the guy who's been trying to erase our existence for the last twelve hours. In this place, you kinda have more control over your environment. He does this nightmare kind of technique to hunt his victims."

"Like Freddy Krueger?" Sin asked.

(AAARGH! That's not how it works! This isn't a dream!)

"Well, the doom and gloom is definitely not working at all with this place," Sin commented, glancing around at the empty skies and black bottomless pit. "It's so cliché." She snapped her fingers. "Oh! I have an awesome idea." She clapped her hands and muttered a couple different phrases.

The area changed dramatically. Instead of the dark, ominous plane of nothingness, we found ourselves in a small pasty shop establishment, with hot, steamy donuts and cakes lying freshly cooked on tables. I think I saw our old pal, Saddam-o in the corner, sipping on tea. Of course, it wasn't much of the dainty kind of places, because pumping out of the speakers was a song I recognized from Three Days Grace.

"Oh! I love this song!" Edriss exclaimed.

(What kind of trashy, hysterical garbage is this?) Destiny growled, lashing out at a random employee who fell unconsciousness with a swing of his blade. (And where is the Void?)

Rissa and Sin ignored him, swinging with the beats of the song and belting out the lyrics. "_I can't escape this hell… So many times I've tried, but I'm still caged inside. Somebody get me through this nightmare. I can't control myself!" _They knocked into a square table, sending a milkshake flying at poor Saddam-o's area. "_So what if you can see the darkest side of me? No one will ever change this animal I have become. Help me believe it's not the real me. Somebody help me tame this animal! This animal, this animal_!" The dragon and shadow threw their heads back and howled simultaneously.

(This is ridiculous!) Destiny glanced at the table beside him. (And I didn't order cocoa!)

I wrinkled my nose at him, morphed into a human in two seconds, and took a bite out of a strawberry-and-cream cheese donut. "You know, for someone who can control the spirit realm by slashing his wrists and keeping to a caffeinated diet, you're pretty pathetic." I licked powdered sugar off my fingers. "You just got burned by a teenager."

Sargimf stood at the counter. "I'll have a vanilla glazed, one raspberry filled…"

Ignoring the song continuously pounding out the lyrics, Destiny finally snapped--or had that already happened. (That's it! I've had enough! You've pushed my limit as far as it'll go! It's time to let you realize who you're dealing with!) He raised a hand and sent a bolt of what could have been fire at Rissa.

"_I can't escape myself_!"

"Duck!" Rissa shouted, grabbing her friend and leaping out of the way. The inferno obliterated the small table behind them.

"_So many times I've lied."_

"Hey, pick on someone your own size, you sexist freak!" Sargimf picked up one of his half-dozen pastries. "Here, on the house! Catch!" He threw the donuts at Destiny's hideous face.

(Yuck! I LOATHE cherries!)

"_But there's still rage inside!"_

Suddenly, a shudder rippled through the coffee shop, causing the stereo system to fizzle for a few seconds and knock everyone inside to the tiled floor. I sent a wild look at Rissa, shifting back to my Andalite shape. (What in Purgatory's existence is going on?)

She clenched her jaw. "Destiny and Sinister, especially the Andalite. I think, being still alive and all, they're putting too much stress on the spirit realm's surroundings. The living aren't supposed to have much impact here. The worst we did here was astral travel to visit Visser One in the hospital." She yelped as the place shook again.

"_Somebody get me through this nightmare. I can't control myself_!"

(So what happens now?)

"Unless the higher deities decide to interfere, the Afterlife will try to collapse on itself and balance itself. It'll try to recycle the people who've caused all the trouble," she explained. "Seeing as this is my first time experiencing it outside a book, I only have a suspicion it'll happen."

(How much?)

"About…" She counted on her thumb and three fingers. "Ninety-seven percent sure."

"_So what if you can see the darkest side of me? No one will ever change this animal I have become_."

(What happens to the rest of us?) I asked warily.

Rissa shot me a glare. "How am I supposed to know?" She sighed. "It'll possibly knock Sin back into her mortal body. I have no clue about Destiny. Us…"

(WHAT?!)

"_Help me believe it's not the real me_!"

She gulped and I saw a light sweat permeate through her forehead and back. "Um…we could be flung to another area in the spirit realm. Or possibly reincarnated accidentally. Or…" I became a bit frightened when her eternal self-satisfied grin faltered. "Or the impact of such energy could practically crush our individual essence into Jell-O and be spread across the spirit world like jam on toast."

I snorted back mucus, the Andalite equivalent of a gulp. (Got any religious epiphanies lined up for us now?)

"Just one," she grumbled, crawling inches towards Sargimf with each second passing--well, time doesn't exactly exist there, but you get the suspense, correct? "Grab onto the person you adore and hold on tight. Best let the captain go down with his favorite ship."

"_Somebody help me tame this animal I have become. Help me believe it's not the real me_. _Somebody help me tame this animal!"_

(But I don't--)

Rissa glared at me. "Are you Mr. Denial or what? Go over there and fricking hug or cuddle her, or I'm spending every last second of my existence spouting every journal quote of yours I can think of." Her expression softened as much as it could for a Hork-Bajir, eyes shining and beak a crooked smile. "Besides, it's either her, Destiny, or that smelly, old dictator over there."

(Good point.)

"_Somebody help me through this nightmare. I can't control myself! Somebody wake me from this nightmare. I can't escape this hell!"_

I clopped over to where Visser One was seemingly stuck to the floor, shaking with every convulsion of the restaurant. One of the tables started sliding towards us as if of its own will. FWAPP! Now that table was standing one three legs.

"Thanks," she mumbled.

(No problem.)

"_This animal, this animal, this animal, this animal, this animal, this animal, this animal_!"

The area around us shivered once more, and seemed to liquefy, turning into a blurred pattern until it reshaped back into the Void. Edriss shivered as the chilly wind sliced through her, and I pressed her closer to my warmer fur--see how stupid human bodies are? I watched as the ground started shaking and cracking, big gaping pits opening up every few seconds.

(Any last words?)

She smirked at me, black eyes glinting like ebony crystals. "I hate your lousy guts."

I smiled in return. (I didn't know you cared so much. Usually, most people don't put as much emotion in those they find worthless.)

"Course not. You make a wonderfully efficient punching bag," she offered.

I hugged her instinctively closer as a searing pain rippled through my azure fur and solidified essence, a tremor I couldn't shake away. A white light started to overlap my vision and my ears were filled with a loud, annoying beeping nose. I smelled acidy substances as they stung my flesh that seemed to open at will.

However, my sense of feel remained loyal, my brain humming as my body focused solely on Edriss's smooth cheeks against the palms of my hands.

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Uh oh. One more chapter yet to go, but how does the end come for our favorite Vissers, resident dragon, and Pixie Sticks downing lizard? The only way to know is through reviews, three at least hopefully.

(shrugs) It wasn't exactly as funny as I intended (not even close) but I've been watching Titanic and Brave heart and such the last few days... And I thought, 'Hm, a good, lovey dovey ending for the Vissers. Might work.' Oh well, tell me what you think.

To my reviewers:

Desteny Wolf: Hmmm…offended how? Unless you're a Scientologist (most bogus thing I've heard of), Mormon (Jesus resurrected and appeared in America first?) or atheist (don't make me go there), you're safe from my taunts. Sorry, I can't help it. The idea of the Void after death? Naw, don' think so. Anywho, before you sue me for dising one of the three, thanks for the review! (secretly dances around and shouts, "Could this be a new reviewer to the Rissa/V3 series? Yippie yay!)

Sarah Mercury: (winks) Wasn't so hard to review now, was it? (grimaces) I do try to base a _few_ things off my idea of the Afterlife--choice of paradise (or personal hell), the whole go there and save yourself through epiphany, astral traveling--but please, I hope you're not too serious. (I'm saying this because as a joke, I made a fake cult last year called the "Sargimfs" after I saw the South Park version of Scientology and got two or three followers before I broke the news.) I myself am Presbyterian (of sorts) but I would read a Bible (Christian) or Torah (Judaism) or Veda (Hindu). Sorry, when it comes to religious talk--even the slightest--you may as well have fed me twenty tacos.


	6. New Subordinates and CD

Alright, peeps. Last chapter, so let's make it good, shall we? Let's see…to celebrate 7 reviews (sighs) I shall include a few well deserving guests.

Did Visser Three, Sargimf, Rissa, Sin, and Edriss escape?

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**Chapter 5: New Subordinates and CD**

**Visser Three**

You know that feeling when you push your closed fist into a jar of petroleum jelly? Well, probably not, but you can imagine the greasy, slippery feeling, correct? Good. Because that's what it felt like in those last seconds. Of course, add to that the pressure of a MILLION pounds of spirit world crushing you like a beetle between the thumb and forefinger of a stupid human brat.

But at least we kept our _usual_ dignity.

"If y'all live and I die, I hope I'm reincarnated as a pigeon," Rissa screamed. "I'll be sure to crap on your heads and leave mites on your bedspreads."

"Think HAPPY thoughts!" Sargimf growled. "Beach. Surfing. Trees. Pixie sticks!"

Visser One pressed closer to me. "Gawd, just get this over with!"

(She's kidding! She's kidding! I don't want to be smeared across Nirvana like jam!)

There was an emptiness seeping through me, dulling the agony, but foreboding the fact that my complete existence was about to be deleted. Erased. X-ed. It went up from my tail and back hooves, across my deer-like section, upwards through my torso, and finally consuming my head. It was worst then the Void, for what would be left of me…?

For a while, I just drifted, seeing, hearing, feeling nothing. Was this Purgatory? Or Limbo? Or one of a few other choice places Rissa and Sargimf had talked about in boredom?

Voices…

Exaggerated, foggy, echoing voices, but…did that mean I was cuckoo? Was that the rest of eternity? To be trod upon and listening to thousands of the dead while I was little more than Heaven and Hell's carpeting? Did that…

Beep! Beep! Beep!

"Evian? Doctor dude, he's waking up, I think! Get your butt over here!" Hands grabbed my…arm and shook me. "Yo, Visser Three, Esplin, get your lazy ass up. I'm not going to let another one of you die. Live! Live!"

I cracked one eye open, but the room was spinning, with a clear, fluorescent light bulb hanging above, shining brightly. (The light… I see the light… Turn it off.)

Voices started panicking. "I don't have a license, so…Iniss, your Visser needs CPR right now. He's not breathing again." Something that smelled like stale alcohol and Cheetos came towards me, with thinning brown hair and…

(AAAHHH! Get off me! Get off me! I'm up, I'm up! Blech!)

Arms, dozens it seemed, wrapped around me, squishing the life out of me. Ahh! Would they ever stop! "Visser Three, you're alive…again," a Hork-Bajir said. Sargimf? No, there was a streak of red along one of the forehead blades. Rissa? What the…? "Yeah, pipe down about the transformation. I can even be a human too! Awesome no? Take that."

(My eight-headed, fire breathing blue monkey could take you out any time,) I hissed. (Wh-what happened?) I surveyed the room, seeing Rissa, Sargimf, Sin (where the hell did she come from?), Iniss, and some dark-haired boy who must've been the one I'd heard before. But…if Rissa, Sargimf, and I made it, where was Edriss? I pushed that aside to glare at the boy. (Who are you now?)

He struck his chest out like a cocky rooster. "Darth Vader es cool 5 be my name, but you could merely call me Darth Vader Dude, or DVD for short."

I rubbed my forehead. (Okay, Rissa was almost run over, Sin got swooped into Summerland with us, and I'm guessing there was a freak elephant or flamethrower incident that brought you here?)

"Nope. I was reading this, eh, story called Code Resurrection, complained I didn't have a part in it and went to realign my Zen sing some cheap incense. Badaboom, I find myself working as a candy striper here at the Yeerk Hospital, handing out lollipops and watching my favorite Visser come out of a coma," DVD explained.

I scratched my ear. (I could use some of that _incense_ right now.)

"V-v-visser, we were afraid you'd be a vegetable forever," Iniss whined. "I didn't want my leader turned into a tomato!"

(A tomato's a fruit, retard,) I snapped. Sigh. What would these people do without me? (Now, where the _hell_ is Edriss? She was with us too, which means she should've--) Sargimf reached over and pinched my forearm. (Ow! You are so demoted now!)

"No one knows about our favorite lassie, or anything that happened to our _destiny_," Sin snapped, now joining in the Mess-With-Esplin-Game. She glanced at Iniss's baffled expression. "Not that I think our current company would figure anything out."

DVD checked a small chart he was holding. "Well, from what I can see of Evian's scribbles, you should be fine as long as you keep away from traffic, eat plenty of grass, and don't eject yourself out of Bug Fighters for ten or so more years."

(I would have never figured that out,) I said dryly. (Iniss, you noob! Get me some oatmeal, stat!)

"But, Visser, that could harm--" Iniss started.

(Screw what the medics say. Get me some Quaker or your head!) I growled. (Alright, give me what happened. We've been dead for twenty-four hours, so how did we come back?)

"Actually, it was two weeks," Sargimf said. "Time doesn't exist in the Other Place. Duh."

"You four missed so much!" Darth Vader exclaimed. "There's about five new sub-Vissers, a cure for saline poisoning for Yeerks, gold digger wives with deceased eighty-year-old husbands dying, former singers shaving off their hair and leaving her kids with a hobo rapper. Sheesh, what _have_ you not missed?"

(I was talking about Visser One,) I snarled. (Is she alive or dead? Rissa?)

The dragon-human turned Hork-Bajir shuffled her clawed feet clumsily. "I'm not quite sure. If we survived, I figured she'd be okay as well. I mean, she _should _have appeared with us, especially the fact that Sin--as much not a part of this dimension as I am--and Darth, too, are here. I don't know."

(Fine. Knowing her she's either back or mooching off whatever Heaven--or more likely _Hell_--can afford,) I mused. The Devil would've met his match for sure. (So then, what happened to Destiny? He still at large or more screwed up than we were supposed to be?)

"Celbrako? That his name?" Sin asked. She shrugged. "I checked a few computers, but there's no data about him, besides some award for Poetry. There was a footnote about "mysterious disappearance" but no further details."

(Why are you--) I asked.

Rissa interrupted, "Oh, right. Visser Three, Esplin 9466, meet your two newest subordinate recruits. In some ways, Sinister should be the most familiar of all--but I won't say anything else on that." She winked slyly. "Darth is our would-be medic, while you can think of Sin as your part-time investigator."

(And what the hell do _you_ ever do?) I asked.

She closed her eyes and made an insulted noise. "I'm your spiritual informer--with our lives, there's got to be a trilogy to this coming--and make margaritas. Honestly, I'm so underappreciated around here. You two will get used to it as well soon enough."

I groaned. I didn't have time for this bull. Two more subordinates? Wasn't there a limit to this? I had to have about ten or twenty by now, each about as competent as a badminton birdie, with less sanity included. And, WHAT ABOUT EDRISS?!

Speaking of brainless assistants… "Like, Visser, you've got mail!" Ellie cried, running through the open door and stoping by my bed, panting. "You got like a package from like someone. Like, what is it? Like, a note of like resignation from one of your like headless employees."

Wonderful. Topping everything off, my pink assistant was growing a sense of dry humor. Lovely. Let me guess, Iniss got some wit and grew sarcastic?

Sin sighed. "I'm so sorry, guys. I didn't understand HOW annoying an author can dish them out. Please forgive me." She backed away from DVD and Rissa's glances.

Ignoring her, I growled, (Get out of here Elie.) Nothing. (OUT!) Nothing, just stubborn persistence to see what I'd received. (_Out_, or I can already smell the fumes of burning pink pompoms.) Huh where had she gone?

I tore up the package and raised an eye ridge. Inside was a CD. I picked it up and laughed as I read the title of the band, with the first song on it. (I can only wonder who'd send me a Three Days Grace CD.)

DVD scratched his nose. "Don't you guys already have that one?"

I rolled my eyes. (Guess this means our ride isn't over yet.)

Rissa grinned. "Purgatory, Summerland, maybe next time we can land in the Land of the Dead with Osiris next time." She ducked a tennis shoe throw at her head. "Ah!"

(Sin, you just earned yourself a promotion.)

Now, there was only one more problem to go…

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**Destiny**

I glanced around at the mist surrounding me, swirling in off white patterns. (Okay. I appear to be stuck in some sort of Limbo realm. That's fine, that's nothing big, Back home on the Andalite World, one of the others should open up the chamber if my brainwaves appear unstable.)

I waited. And remembered something rather crucial.

(Well, we were all planning to infest the Vissers and others at the same time, so they're probably still in their life support tanks like myself. Well, no biggie.) I snapped my fingers, stirring a bucket of mocha café at my hooves. (Someone is sure to stumble upon the base. Wait. Maybe I shouldn't have covered it with a force field and put it underground. Also, there's the fact that if they screw up with any of the code sequences, the place is set to explode, with or without me in here.)

I tapped my chin, thinking. (Perhaps the Yeerks and dragon-girl will desire revenge. Visser Three, as dumb as he can be, should be able to figure out a few cryptic codes to open this place up.) I slapped my forehead. (But then, maybe I shouldn't have hidden this area on the Homeworld, where they would be kill the Abomination on _sight_. Whoops. Oh boyo, oh boyo.)

Two figures suddenly stepped out of the mist, forms unclear, but I would've leapt for joy at anyone releasing me. (Over here! Help me out!)

The first, a Hork-Bajir female, cocked her head to the side. "Hey, Elfangor, isn't that the douche bag that cheated on your tests in school? And confirmed that there was no Yeerk activity on Earth before…you know."

The Andalite narrowed his eyes. (Yeah, I think so.) He grinned. (This is going to be fun.)

Gulp.

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Well, a happy ending for everybody, partially… So the story goes on, well this one ended, but new ones shall arise, with Dartha and Sin as well! Happy Lent everybody!

To my reviewers:

Darth Vader es Cool 5: Happy now? ;p Who else around here would've connected Purgatory with Animorphs? _Someone _had to do it. Just doing my duty.

Lonnagriffin: Here ya go! Happy, eh, Soon-to-be-End-Third-Nine-Weeks-in-School. Whew, what a mouthful.


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